By Catherine McCall
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Extra info for When the Piano Stops: A Memoir of Healing from Sexual Abuse
I make it sound cheery. I’m trying to act like Patty Duke, the star of my favorite TV show. I hope that if I act cute and carefree he’ll get out of my room and leave my stuff alone. But he doesn’t. He stays. “Hello, Catherine Girl. Mother tells me your stomach has been upset lately. ” My voice is monotone. indd 49 1/16/09 1:49:32 PM 50 When the Piano Stops “I see here that you had no period in October, and so far you’re late for November. It’s nothing to be worried about, dear. ” He turns around and walks out the door.
I run behind, and just as she starts to sit down, I pull it out from under her, thinking I’m making a funny joke for everyone so that we can be one big happy family now that we have our mommy back. Mommy’s on the floor in pain. I hurt her. ” Daddy yells. Lucy and Paul are crying. ” Andrew screams. ” I run into my room and close the door. Imbecile. I lie down on my bed and cry. Then I get up and turn the crucifix on the wall backward, so Jesus won’t have to see me. indd 29 1/16/09 1:49:26 PM 30 When the Piano Stops am?
He’s lifting me out of the bed. He’s talking to me, but I don’t hear a word he says. He’s carrying me to my own bed in my own room, just like a normal daddy would do to his little girl. But he’s not a normal daddy. I’m very relieved to lie in my own bed. I hear him talking again. “It’s okay, Cath. There’s nothing to be afraid of. Nothing happened. And if you think anything did, you’re wrong. It’s all in your imagination, sweetheart. You must never talk about this to anyone. Do you understand? .