The Weight of Money

Today’s not been a very good money conversation day — seems to be one of those days where one little thing turns to another, another, another until everyone is rattling out all the millions of things that could be wrong. Guess it’s just a little crack of financial stress and it isn’t all the surprising, though I found some of the comments so.

The partner and I were discussing the “sacrifices” that have been made the past two or so years to help us get our house and eventually our financial house in order. Lots of financial progress is on hold as we mostly tread water, which doesn’t make for feelings of comfort and joy at this time of year. Seems that the partner is struggling with how his life has changed and how he can’t just throw a wad of cash in his pocket every weekend and spend it however he wants. Burning a couple hundred dollars on a lark just isn’t in our budget and even a couple hundred dollar for needed items is a hard sell right now. But with this argument, I can’t help pointing out that nothing has changed between now and his previous spending other than he’s now looking at reality and taking responsibility for it.

We started out our relationship, each with pretty sizable debt. Mine was tied to the degree I’m still not using in terms of student loans, his was all in unsecured credit card debt. So all these comments about how he was spending whatever, whenever had to be correlated to the sizable credit card debt that we’re still working down. So, are there sacrifices being made now, or is it just facing reality? Obviously, I’m much more in the facing reality camp, and I’m not looking for support one way or another — just commenting on the very different perception each of us has at the current situation.

I’m sure that this is an uncomfortable situation to be in, watching dimes and knowing that making ends meet takes real work, but to continue mourning a lifestyle that wasn’t financially responsible to begin with doesn’t win bonus points with me. As for the current financial stress, I’ve dealt with money issues my whole life and I can’t help seeing the fact that because we can pay our bills and have more than enough to eat - it isn’t all that much to get upset over. I’ll work on having more sympathy for the partner who doesn’t have the same life experience or outlook.

We’re all set to start round two of orthodontia for the daughter. First order of business is to use up the funds in our 2007 FSA ($600). I’ll just apply it to the orthodontic treatment and not worry about the piddly prescriptions and copays that we had earlier this year — from a paperwork standpoint, this is easier. I’ll also need to pull $468 from the daughter’s child support fund to make the first payment. Oh what fun.

Here is where I threw the financial secretary for a loop. We’re basically just doing monthly payments of about $133 — but because I’ve decided to apply $1,000 of next years FSA to her treatment, I’ll be making a $1,000 payment in January and then just make $50/month payments for the remainder of the year. It took a lot of discussion to finally get her to realize that this is exactly the same thing as paying $133/month (well, actually, it’s about $4 more for the year) and that I’m doing it that way because then I can put in an FSA claim in January for the $1,000 instead of putting in monthly claims for $133. Again, I like making the paperwork easy and I love that you can file a claim before the full amount is in the account. Woot!

Simple, right? It certainly didn’t feel like it after being on the phone for way too long. Of course, even with all this hoop jumping, the daughter won’t be getting her new appliance until after the new year as it’ll take a few weeks to get it made. I know she’s awfully disappointed about that (note of sarcasm).

But, to make financial matters worse, the same day I’m working out all of these details, I get an email from the daughter’s summer camp that registration is now open. A quick glance at the rate confirms my fear that prices have gone up again - only $50 this year, compared to a $100 increase last year. But I guess when you’re looking at almost a thousand dollars for summer camp, whats another $10, $50, $100?!? Come next year, when I imagine rates will hit (and hopefully not cross) that $1,000 threshold, I’m going to have a very hard time getting my hand to stroke that check. Fortunately, the child support fund has enough to cover the application fee and deposit and should have enough deposits to make the final payments on time.

Side note on sumer camp: not attending summer camp is simply not an option; while paying for it is a major strain, I continue to firmly believe that it is worth even (painful) cent. But for parents just now considering summer camp, be sure to pick one that is affordable before you fall in love with it and vow that it is indeed an experience your children must have each year. At times I wish that I didn’t know about this camp, but it’s too late now.

Perhaps the first vehicle purchase will happen sooner than we expected. The partner called to relay some vehicle woes and get my opinion in terms of the financial impact of the situation. Basically, there is a potential problem that could be small or large. The options are drive to the shop and drop off the vehicle — and I drive down and pick him up (not a popular idea thanks to today’s snow storm) — or try driving home and hopefully the engine doesn’t lock up and die.

Thats a difficult choice — we’ve just shoved money into this suv that we already said we wouldn’t put anything else into. The partner wants it through the winter cause he finds value in the four-wheel drive, something I’ve never thought twice about because my front-wheel-drive car has always performed exceptionally well in all weather conditions. At the moment, our spare vehicle is in need of major work, needs new tires, and has no heat (I don’t mind putting money into this vehicle, we just haven’t had the extra to spare the past few months); so, it’s not really a good back-up at this point.

My verdict: drive home and if the car dies, then we get another car now instead of in 2 months, 4 months, 6 months. Now, it does seem fairly likely that it’ll make it home just fine, but that maybe condition is always a little nerve racking. I just can’t accept the idea of it going into the shop again — I’m still pretty upset about the last repair job.

Oh, and if the suv dies, I imagine that the spare vehicle will end up in the shop and have new tires thrown on it before we get around to actually buying another car. But, I doubt that temporary fix will last for long as the partner is very uncomfortable without a backup vehicle waiting in the wings.

2007 is basically over in my book, time keeps rushing past and there is no slowing down in sight. As I start thinking about 2008, I’m starting to panic — just a little. I feel like we’re teetering on some major financial obstacles that I don’t think we’ll be able to skirt around as we have this year. Basically, there are five major expenses simmering under the surface and 2008 looks like the boiling point. As I reflect on the goals that did or did not happen this year, I need to get a very thorough action plan in place for what we are going to do about next year. Time to get off the procrastination wagon.

• Buy a family/commuting car. We need a vehicle that is better suited for commuting than the small SUV the partner is currently driving or my stick shift vehicle. The mpg on the SUV isn’t the greatest, but the issue is mostly that it’s falling apart, slowly and surely — I’m pretty sure I said this last year too and the new commute is hastening it’s demise. Also, it’s a two door family car and we’re finding that just isn’t enough any more. So, we need a new (to us), four-door, family/commuting car. The reason my car doesn’t fit this bill is that its two-doors, manual transmission, and has no a/c. The manual transmission doesn’t lend itself to low-stress, stop and go commute driving, and while the lack of a/c has been a standard in all of our vehicles (and our home), the partner has reached the end of the line for putting up with that.
• Buy a truck. We both need new vehicles (partially explained above and left somewhat vague intentionally) and the truck is to replace my car. We need to be able to haul stuff and my car can’t do it and the SUV is dying. We do have a utility van, but we often need to haul stuff and people and the van only seats two. Now, it may end up being another SUV type vehicle, even though I don’t care for those very much, as long as it has a hitch and the ability to pull a trailer. Whatever it is, it’ll be my new get-around-town vehicle, as the new car should be more suitable for commuting. Despite my long-stated reluctance to get a larger vehicle, I’m starting to accept this idea; though I’ll still mourn the lost off my little compact car.
• Build a shop. Even though this big-ticket item fell off my fall agenda, the need for it hasn’t decreased. It’s not an optional choice, though the need for two new vehicles makes it a financially more painful one. Now, I can ramble on about the differences between needs and want, but the end result is that a shop is a must have and another year without one is not acceptable. Hopefully the partner and I will find time to evaluate our outdoor space a bit more and figure out what the bare minimum is for the initial structure (with plans to build on more as finances allow). We already have a few required elements that are already having a pretty serious impact on the price — as in the need for a two story shop (not just one with some attic space) — and we need to figure out how to get the minimum erected and hope to do more on our own as time and resources allow.
• Orthodontia for the daughter. I’ve been putting this off for the past two months, but we’ll need to get started. I’ve finally decided to continue with our current providers, versus finding someone new, and just need to bite the bullet and sign the agreement to part with several thousand dollars over the next year or so. Maybe we’ll be able to drag it out a bit longer than usual to make it a little more manageable.
• Medical Expenses. Looks like there are some upcoming medical expenses that we probably won’t be able to avoid next year. The non-insured amounts are still somewhat vague, but it’ll still be significant compared to the less than $100 we spent on medical expenses this year.

Oh boy, looks like I’ve got some work cut out for me in making these things happen. Winning the lottery looks more and more appealing every day as I struggle to figure out how to make these things happen. Luckily, my business is expanding rapidly at the moment and next year looks even more promising for new avenues of income.

I’ve been so overwhelmed with a million projects, that the finances keep falling further and further down my todo list. Managing the monthly budget is basically not happening but bills are getting paid. There are a few major money items that have been looming that I’m finally getting to today. If only I hadn’t waited, we’d be in a much better position.

Procrastinating on the purchase of oil has been the biggest mistake lately. We knew it would be cheaper to get moving on this in the summer, but we let project after project get in the way. Now, we’re looking at a price of more than 60 cents a gallon higher than we were this summer. But, at least I’ve finally made the calls and didn’t go with the person who had the contract before because their price is much higher per gallon than the other places I’ve called today. Yes, making the call still pays off, but I sure haven’t felt like doing it. We still haven’t turned the heat on, but we are getting down to just a month or so of oil left for hotwater usage.

The other big kicker is following up on a problem with our escrow account. I waited a couple weeks too late to contact our closing company about funds that went missing. They were supposed to pay our first tax bill but didn’t. So our mortgage company politely paid it, but our escrow account didn’t cover it because a tax payment wasn’t supposed to leave there until December. Then they politely jacked up our monthly escrow payments to compensate for this. Of course, this is the first indication that something was amiss, because I knew we paid for months of taxes at closing and had assumed it’d gone into escrow, obviously it didn’t. If I’d called the closing company right after receiving the notice, I would have found the money sooner (they were still holding it and never did tell me why). So, now I need to get off to the post office to send the mortgage company the money I just got from the closing company. Sigh.

Last but not least is that it’s time to get the daughter’s second round of orthodontia started and only a few weeks left in the year for the FSA thats still holding several hundred dollars in it. Of course, that isn’t anything in comparison to the treatment costs, but I need to get moving before we end up losing that cash for this year. Next year should be pretty interesting for FSA costs, looks like we’ll be taking the maximum allowance to cover the rest of treatment and some other upcoming medical expenses.

Maybe if I’d get back to posting more often, I’d be more intune with my money status and wouldn’t let stuff slip as far as it has.